Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Head Down

This post needs a short explanation. First, I don't have anything pressing on my mind or heart, so I revert to my easy way out--publishing song lyrics or some past writing. Today I choose one of the handful of poems I have written.

This poem is not indictative of my current mood (I feel great right now). I wrote this poem in February 2002. Some events in my life triggered some deep seated emotions, leftover scar tissue, from way back in my past. This is one of my favorite self-authored poems, not because it is dark, but because it was cathartic. I finally expressed some pain that had been lingering a long time. Now, pain doesn't just go away because you wrote a poem, or song, or told a therapist. But such actions are a small step toward healing.

Anyway, I subject my readers to this poem for a lack of anything better to write, and the fact that continued silence would just be too prudent.

Head Down
Head down, head down, maybe the beating will pass.
Head down, head down, maybe the ridicule will miss.
Born not this way – head down.
Created this way I believe not – head down.

Head up, head up, is my natural place.
Head up, head up, with smiling face.
Head up, head up, through life at an excited pace.
Innocent and naïve, degradation I did not believe.
Was not looking, was not prepared, when execration came sweeping.

Heads up, heads up, your above your place.
Heads up, heads up, your out of place.

Head down, head down, put you in your place.
Head down, head down, inferior is your space.
Ashamed, I am, that I was not stronger; but fight, I can no longer.
The neck of my soul has been broken, and its shoulders falter.

Head down, head down, head down this lonely path.
Head down, head down, head down into the depths.
Head down, head down, head down this dangerous path.
Head down, head down, maybe this too shall pass.


JMG said...

Wow, it looks like you went through a really rough patch at some point in your life. It seems, though, that you came out the better for it.

Tony Arnold said...

It was a lot tougher than I realized at the time. Unfortunately it was during the formulative years of personality and social interaction, so I developed some less than attractive personality traits that have taken a long time to counteract.

First, realization of such traits is the most difficult. Then understanding where they come from is tough. Once you get through that you have to change them, and that is a slow process. Too slow for my liking.