I Just Know

This Christmas morning I was surprised to see in our local paper, The Tennessean, an eight page section entitled "The Story of Christmas". The bottom third of each page were Christmas and Holiday Greetings from hundreds of advertisers. The top two-thirds of each page however, contained the text from Luke 2:1-20. Now, this post is not about Christ in Christmas, Christmas political correctness, Christmas Theology, or Christ being more than a story. There are plently of blogs discussing these things, so go there if you want to rant pro or con, secular or Christian.

This post is about my emotions this morning. I decided to read the scripture aloud to my wife and daughter wanting to take this opportunity to remind my five year old that life is about much more than receiving presents. As I read the passage below, I became very emotional.

An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

Suddenly, a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."--Luke 2:9-14

I teared up and I was overwhelmed with an emotion that is difficult to describe. It is a deep emotion that is full of joy, but something so much more. It is an emotion that carries validity and truth with it--joy with conviction. An emotion that literally drives me to my knees in gratidtude and prayer. This is not the first time I have felt this emotion. It happens periodically at unexpected times, yet times directly associated with my faith: when I have been walking in nature alone; in my church at the foot of a cross immediately after watching The Passion of Christ; driving to worship on a beautiful morning; during a worship song (there is no certain song); etc. The occurance of this emotion seems very random and large periods of time can elapse between occurances.

I believe this emotion is the Holy Spirit. I believe it is a gift of affirmation from God. Faith cannot be proven, that is why it is called faith. I believe that God comforts and affirms my faith if I am attuned to listen. I believe this emotion is the emotion that perplexed C.S. Lewis which he described in his book Surprised by Joy. I don't try to understand or explain these waves of emotion. I just accept and enjoy them. It is a part of my personal experience that shapes my beliefs. The occurances are real and I cannot ignore them. You may challenge that I misinterpret them. Well, so be it.

These occurances are how I explain to those that ask, "But how do you know?" I answer, "I can't explain my conviction of faith very well. I am not spiritually mature enough or articulate enough to do so. But these waves of unexpected emotion are one of the ways I know. I just know.

Today I was moved and reminded that my Savior was born, and as Jettybetty stated, He was born to die. It is this fact that I strive to celebrate everyday with my life.

Thank you Lord! Christ I claim you as King, and I love you with all my heart, soul, and being!

This I shout from my keyboard to all the blog world. And, I am not angry or offended if you don't agree, but I am not afraid to proclaim it either. To quote a line about faith from a song I love, a secular rock song for that matter: "They'll ask, 'how did you know?' I'll say, 'I just knew.' I always believed in you!"

I bring you good news of great joy; he is Christ the Lord.

Tony

Free Masonry and Legal Kill

This week's post is not a personal commentary or opinion. It is a data and comment collection post on two different subjects.

First, my curosity on a subject I know nothing about was raised recently while watching a movie. When I get curious about a subject, I usually do some quick research trying to find the best books on the subject, and then I get a few to read. The object of my curosity this time is Free Masonry. I know very little about Free Masons. So while I read up on the subject, I would like to collect some insight or comments from the blog world. I will provide no comment for or against so as not to pollute any input, other than to say I am not interested in joining any group, well alone Free Masons, I am just curious.

Second topic: Below are the lyrics to a song I like. Just wonder what your opinion of the lyrics are.

Legal Kill
by Pinnick, Tabor and Gaskill

Only know what I believe
The rest is so absurd to me
I close my eyes so I can't see
But the picture just gets clearer everyday
I read somewhere to learn is to remember
And I've learned we all forgot
There was peace in her before
But that was yesterday

But I can see the beauty that is here for me
The chance to live and walk free
From a legal kill

I know your side so very well
It makes no sense that I can tell
The smell of hell is what I smell
And you hand it out with handshakes everyday
I have trouble with the persons with the signs
but I feel the need to make my own
Yes there are two ways to be
And truth does not depend on me

But I can feel the fight for life is always real
I can't believe its no big deal
It's a legal kill

Have fun with the topics.

Tony

Radical Lifestyle Change Clarification

This comment was made in my last post, "But I don't think that the suggestion to "debliberately reduce your income and lifestyle to live below the point where Federal Income Tax is owed" is really a call to discipleship. It's simply a legal way to avoid paying taxes. "

I want to be clear in my intended communication. First, for disciples wrestling with the Christian ethics of war and their involuntarty support via taxes, voluntarily living under the tax line is a option that is legal, does not violate Mt. 22:21, is in the spirit of Mark 10:21, and requires sacrifice and self-denial. This would hold true for other moral dilemmas such as abortion, etc.

More importantly is the point that if I choose to obey Mark 10:21 in the spirit of serving the kingdom, then I by default live below the tax line and avoid involuntary support of anthing the government does. If I were to sell all, quit my job, and participate in mission work, I would be following Christ per Mark 10:21. I would also not being paying taxes, even though my motivation was to follow Christ, not avoid taxes.

If I voluntarily began living with the absolute minimum resources required, I could give most of my salary to Kingdom work while in the secular career where God led me. And I would be living below the tax line with the purest of motives. If the giving exceeded tax limits, then I could negoatiate with my employer to donate that portion to the charity of my choice. Or I could setup a foundation which my salary goes to and draw only the minimum needed while giving the rest away. There would be a way to maximize the money going to Kingdom work.

The commentator also said this, "I know you know the story of Rich Mullins who lived on a small, fixed income... . I think it's his example that is the better suggestion. Rich didn't do that to avoid paying taxes, he did it to keep himself humble and free from the greed and excessive materialism that he saw around him."

That is exactly my point and one I had hoped I had clarified in my post or in discussion comments. But maybe this was not evident, so I make this effort to clarify.

What about family? How can you live at this level and provide for your family including education. I would suspect that your gross needed, although above the tax line, would be reduced to below the line with the deductions and credits allowed. If not, I would go ask somone like Stephen Meeks who has lives this way and has 5 children how he does it. (also see his Good Soil Ministries site)

The purpse here is not to avoid taxes, but to maximize the amount of effort or resources that goes toward kingdom work.

What about using societal resources and infrastructure without contributing? Would not this lifestyle contribute to society and more than offset the use of resources? That is why the government allows charitable tax deductions and family tax credits.

This discussion began as a war and tax issue, but is no longer; it is now a Kingdom and heart issue for me. Now to the aspect that really bothers me. I am not willing to make this radical change at this point in my life. Don't bother asking why not, I don't know. That is what bothers me. I don't think my unwillingness damns me or makes me a bad person. But, what I do know is that it would be a decision in which my Savior would find joy. No one could argue it as a bad choice.

But I can't pull the trigger. I am the rich, young ruler! Oh sure, I have greatly reduced my material expenditures; I serve more in direct Kingdom work; I donate more. But I know I could do more. I and Christ know my heart. There are certain steps I am not ready to make. But shouldn't I not only be willing to, but wanting to make these choices for my Savior? How convicted am I really? Not enough! And I am suppose to be completely convicted.

I know one other thing: Now that these questions have been raised within me, it would be a sin to sweep them under the rug. I believe this struggle of heart is purposeful by the Spirit and healthy for me spiritually. One comfort I take away is also found in Mark 10: (21) Jesus looked at him and loved him. (26-27) "Who then can be saved?" Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God."

I close with the lyrics of a favorite song.

It's Love
by Pinnick, Tabor, Gaskill

I sit in a chair reflecting back upon my life
And I have so much yet to learn, and so much yet to do.

Its love, ove, ove.
That holds it all together, I'm just glad to let you know
That its love, ove, ove
Thats holding back the weather, and the same will let it go

I sit on the beach feeling the wind, feeling your hand
In all there's a ship on the ocean, and I can't decide if I like it

Its love, ove, ove.
That holds it all together, I'm just glad to let you know
That its love, ove, ove
Thats holding back the weather, and the same will let it go

2nd Edition: Radical Discipleship and Legal Protest

Extra, Extra; Blog Post Addendum: I think all that visit this blog and have participated in this discussion of this particular post will be delighted to follow this link Picket Line Dec. 14 Post. If you ever wondered how Christian discourse can affect others, either postively or negatively, this blog post link will cause you pause. Also, I more convinced than ever that those seeking to be better disciples can learn much from "non-believers", as well as from each other.
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I recently discovered the purpose and legacy of the Federal Excise Tax on our phone bills. It is a war tax instituted to fund the Spanish-American War and kept in play for all our other wars. Many have chosen to protest the Iraq war by refusing to pay this tax. For more detail reference my post "Civil Disobedience, War Protest, and Discipleship" at the Mere Discipleship Discussion blog.

One commentator left a wonderful suggestion to the question I posed, "does a disciple who is morally opposed to the war have a valid reason, even an obligation, to participate in the civil disobedience of withholding taxes?"

His suggestion was not only legal and the perfect solution, but it is also a suggestion he says he has been practicing. It was such a great suggestion I had to call attention to it. Deliberately reduce your income and lifestyle to live below the point where Federal Income Tax is owed. Please check out the website The Picket Line.

The great thing is the suggestion does not have to be a resistance choice. For the Christian it can be living the life Christ calls us to. One could give away his income to live below the tax line or live a life of service to those in need such that any income would not exceed the tax line. With this method you can avoid greed, materialism, power, supporting corporations whose investments might cause moral dilemmas, etc.

Jesus looked at him and loved him. "One thing you lack," he said. "Go sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me." Mark 10:21

I will answer the question many may ask me after this post, "Are you going to do this Tony?"

I doubt it. I honestly don't think I have the courage to do it. And based on that answer, this may be the end of my blogging. I don't know. It may be hard for me to keep writing knowing I am a coward and a hypocrit.

Left From the Right

This week I am sharing some lyrics from one of my favorite CD's. The songs are from Extreme's epic album, III Sides to Every Story. I hope you find the lyrics as meaningful and profound as I have. The music is amazing as well, but that I cannot share here. Thanks to my friend Doug P. for turning me onto this beautiful work. Not all the songs from the CD are included and they are not necessarily in the order of the playlist.
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III Sides to Every Story
Songs written by Nuno Bettencourt and Gary Cherone

Rest in Peace
Let's talk of peace sounds so cliché; A novelty; Catch phrase of the day
Middle, index, sign of the time Just as complex, As water to ...
Someone said give peace a chance. And, that's all that we're saying.
While we're sitting on the fence pretending our hearts are in the right place.

But, your face shows a trace of hypocrisy; Don't tread on me, Now you can see,
Make love not war sounds so absurd to me
We can't afford to say these words lightly; Or else our world will truly, rest in peace!

Let's not pretend to justify; Rather amend, where treasures lie.
Straight through the heart; Peace can be found.
That's where you start, not all around.
Someone said give peace a chance. And, that's all that we're saying.
While we're sitting on the fence pretending our hearts are in the right place.

But, your face shows a trace of hypocrisy; Don't tread on me, boy
Now you can see.
Make love not war sounds so absurd to me.
We can't afford to say these words lightly; Or else our world will truly, rest in peace!

Peacemaker Die
Peacemaker die, Mr. righteous one. You say you have this plan? If we care to understand.
Peacemaker die, Mr. nice guy. You dare to speak the truth? I'll twist and turn it into lies.

Blessed are the warmongers; Blessed are the warmongers.
For they shall be called Man-made gods.
Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, I don't know why?
Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die,Peacemaker die, I don't know why?

Peacemaker die, Mr. goody two shoes. Do you really thing the world can be black, white, and jew?
Peacemaker die, Mr. music man. Don't turn your back on me? Cause I'm the one with the gun.

Blessed are the warmongers; Blessed are the warmongers;
For they shall be called Sons of god.
Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, I don't know why? Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die, Peacemaker die,Peacemaker die, I don't know why?

(live excerpts from MLK)
I have a dream this afternoon that the brotherhood of man will become a reality in this day.
With this faith, I will go out and carve the tunnel of hope through the mountain of despair.
With this faith, I will go out with you and transform dark yesterdays into bright tomorrows.
With this faith, we will be able to achieve this new day when all of god's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics will be able to join hands;
And sing with the negroes, in the spiritual of old
Free at last, free at last, Thank God almighty, we're free at last.

Color Me Blind
I had a dream last night. I was blind. And I couldn't see color of any kind.
Picture the world minus a rainbow. When day becomes night then where will the sun go.
Dancing alone just me and my shadow. Color me blind. So I can see no evil.

Why do we dream in black and white? Color me blind.
Why do we dream in black and white? Color me blind.

I had a dream. I was looking over the mountain. But I've yet to see the so-called promised land.
Picture the world without any color. You couldn't tell one face from the other.
I don't understand why we fight with our brother.

Color me blind. Just to love one another. Color me, color you, color me blind.

Am I Ever Gonna Change
I'm tired of being me. And I don't like what I see. I'm not who I appear to be.
So I start off every day down on my knees. I will pray for a change in any way.
But as the day goes by I live through another lie. If it's any wonder why.

Am I ever gonna change? Will I always stay the same?
If I say one thing, then I do the other.
It's the same old song that goes on forever.

Am I ever gonna change? I'm the only one to blame?
When I think I'm right I wind up wrong.
It's a futile fight gone on too long.

Please tell me if it's true. Am I too old to start anew?
Cause that's what I want to do.
But time and time again when I think I can;
I fall short in the end. So why do I even try?
Will it matter when I die? Can anyone hear my cry?

Am I ever gonna change? Take it day by day.
My will is weak and my flesh too strong.
This peace I seek till thy kingdom comes.

Seven Sundays
One day we'll find the time to spend, together. Until then, my love.
If I had one wish it wouldn't be hard to choose.
Seven sundays in a row. Cause that's the day that I spend with you.

Someday soon, you and I will hold each other. Once again, my love.
If I had one wish it wouldn't be hard to choose.
Seven sundays in a row. Seven sundays in a row. Seven sundays in a row.
Cause that's the day that I spend with you.

If I had one wish it wouldn't be hard to choose.

Who Cares?
Tell me, Jesus are you angry? One more sheep has just gone astray.
A hardening of hearts turning to stone. Wandering off so far from home.
So many children losing time. Walk in darkness looking for a sign.
Chasing their rainbows the future looks so bright. Slowly we're losing sight of the light.

Who cares? Who cares? Who cares? Tell me who cares? Who cares?
All alone out in the cold. Can't look back. Am I growing old? I chose a path.
Is this my fate? Am I finding out the truth too late?

Here I am. A naked man. Nothing to hide. With empty hands.
Remember me, I am the one who lost his way. Your prodigal son.
Who cares? Who cares? Who cares? Tell me who cares? Who cares?
Am I ever gonna change? Will I always stay the same?
Say one thing then I do the other. Same old song goes on forever.
Rise, rise 'n shine. A new day is coming.
Yes it is!

Politicalamity
Wars 'n rumors. Of wars, no one knows what for.
Toys and soldiers. Deployed on some foreign shore.
Lords and rulers. Destroy, diplomatic rapport.

Communists, dictatorships, democracies, hypocrisies.
Ask not what your country can do? To a one world governmental zoo.
Political, political, politicalamity. It's an-ar-chy.
Political, political, politicalamity. Rich 'n poor.

Salute your country's colors. Less is more when one oppresses the other.
Pride 'n power. Decorated upon collars.

Donkeys, bears 'n elephants. All paper-trained on parliament.
Ask not what your country can do? To a one world governmental zoo.

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Now that you have had a chance to read through the lyrics, you will find it interesting that the album was released in 1992.

Are we ever gonna change? Will it always be the same?

Make love (mercy), not war.
We can't afford to say these words lightly; Or else our world will truly, rest in peace!

I really love the double entendre in that last line.